My Worship Revolution

I read this tonight.
It’s the Shakertown Pledge.
Written in 1973.

Recognizing that Earth and the fullness thereof is a gift from our gracious God, and that we are called to cherish, nurture, and provide loving stewardship for Earth’s resources, and recognizing that life itself is a gift, and a call to responsibility, joy, and celebration, I make the following declarations:

1. I declare myself a world citizen
2. I commit myself to lead an ecologically sound life.
3. I commit myself to lead a life of creative simplicity and to share my personal wealth with the world’s poor.
4. I commit myself to join with others in the reshaping of institutions in order to bring about a more just global society in which all people have full access to the needed resources for their physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual growth.
5. I commit myself to occupational accountability, and so doing I will seek to avoid the creation of products which cause harm to others.
6. I affirm the gift of my body and commit myself to its proper nourishment and physical wellbeing.
7. I commit myself to examine continually my relations with others and to attempt to relate honestly, morally, and lovingly to those around me.
8. I commit myself to personal renewal through prayer, meditation, and study.
9. I commit myself to responsible participation in a community of faith.

Wow.  What could the Kingdom impact look like if we all actually committed ourselves to such things?
Which commitment stands out to you the most?
Where do you need to begin?

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Typically I end my day from Recreate with a recap of the day and the speakers with some pictures and videos to bring you along for the ride.
Screw that.
Don’t worry.
I’ll catch you up at some point.
But tonight, instead of the details of the facts, let me quickly update you on another storyline of the conference.
A more intangible storyline.
A more hidden reality.

Often times, when I have those weekends, weeks, whatever, of getting away with God, a theme starts to arise.
It’s what God is doing in the midst of it all to transform and mold my heart.
Regardless of all the great concerts and provocative speakers, that is the part that really matters.

You may have picked up on that theme in my last post.
The title alone starts to hint at it.
It’s the line that grabbed me by the throat in that prayer this morning.

Tonight we had a concert with artists from Word record label.
Meredith Andrews, Patrick Ryan Clark, and Matt Boswell played several song in turn that they wrote.
Then Pocket Full of Rocks rocked the house for a while.
I enjoyed the music, but wasn’t truly engaged.
It’s at times that we least expect it that God breaks in and disrupts our state of mundane complacency.
Pocket Full invited the other three singers up to end in a final worship song and pray over us.
They had us close our eyes, pray, and then started singing.
The chorus of the song they sang…

How marvelous! How wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
How marvelous! How wonderful!
Is my Savior’s love for me!

Next thing I know I was on my feet, eyes closed, tears streaming down my face.
As I pondered what God was doing, it occured to me one of the things God is getting to me about.
How wonderful my Savior’s love for me…
I believe that.  I really, really do.
But I think deep down, I still feel at times like I have to earn it.
I know I don’t.
But in action, I don’t know how to just be.
Will God really approve of me if our church planting efforts fall flat?
Will he really love me if I don’t please him by caring for the least of these?
There’s something to be said for these things.  Yes, they matter to God.
But he loves me, he delights in me, because I’m his.
Period.

I think this is why for the past year the idea and concept of contemplative spirituality and the mystic side of our Christian faith has been drawing me in.
I need it.
I need to learn how to be.
Then I can go and do out of my being.
It’s not always easy, but it’s a great journey to be on.

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Read this poem Samuel Moor Shoemaker this morning.
Well worth the read.
Bolded the part that stood out to me the most.

I Stand By The Door

I stand by the door.
I neither go to far in, nor stay to far out.
The door is the most important door in the world -
It is the door through which men walk when they find God.
There is no use my going way inside and staying there,
When so many are still outside and they, as much as I,
Crave to know where the door is.
And all that so many ever find
Is only the wall where the door ought to be.
They creep along the wall like blind men,
With outstretched, groping hands,
Feeling for a door, knowing there must be a door,
Yet they never find it.
So I stand by the door.

The most tremendous thing in the world
Is for men to find that door – the door to God.
The most important thing that any man can do
Is to take hold of one of those blind, groping hands
And put it on the latch – the latch that only clicks
And opens to the man’s own touch.

Men die outside the door, as starving beggars die
On cold nights in cruel cities in the dead of winter.
Die for want of what is within their grasp.
They live on the other side of it – live because they have not found it.

Nothing else matters compared to helping them find it,
And open it, and walk in, and find Him.
So I stand by the door.

Go in great saints; go all the way in -
Go way down into the cavernous cellars,
And way up into the spacious attics.
It is a vast, roomy house, this house where God is.
Go into the deepest of hidden casements,
Of withdrawal, of silence, of sainthood.
Some must inhabit those inner rooms
And know the depths and heights of God,
And call outside to the rest of us how wonderful it is.
Sometimes I take a deeper look in.
Sometimes venture in a little farther,
But my place seems closer to the opening.
So I stand by the door.

There is another reason why I stand there.
Some people get part way in and become afraid
Lest God and the zeal of His house devour them;
For God is so very great and asks all of us.
And these people feel a cosmic claustrophobia
And want to get out. ‘Let me out!’ they cry.
And the people way inside only terrify them more.
Somebody must be by the door to tell them that they are spoiled.
For the old life, they have seen too much:
One taste of God and nothing but God will do any more.
Somebody must be watching for the frightened
Who seek to sneak out just where they came in,
To tell them how much better it is inside.
The people too far in do not see how near these are
To leaving – preoccupied with the wonder of it all.
Somebody must watch for those who have entered the door
But would like to run away. So for them too,
I stand by the door.

I admire the people who go way in.
But I wish they would not forget how it was
Before they got in. Then they would be able to help
The people who have not yet even found the door.
Or the people who want to run away again from God.
You can go in too deeply and stay in too long
And forget the people outside the door.
As for me, I shall take my old accustomed place,
Near enough to God to hear Him and know He is there,
But not so far from men as not to hear them,
And remember they are there too.

Where? Outside the door -
Thousands of them. Millions of them.
But – more important for me -
One of them, two of them, ten of them.
Whose hands I am intended to put on the latch.
So I shall stand by the door and wait
For those who seek it.

‘I had rather be a door-keeper
So I stand by the door.

Wow.
I think we need more door-keepers.

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A few nights ago, Rachel and I watched the season premier of House.
I love this show.
Great writing and the show is always such an amazing study on our human condition.

Check out this clip from the premier.
The last line of the clip was the most memorable of the episode for me.
Seriously, check it out.

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
       you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
       a broken and contrite heart,
       O God, you will not despise.
Psalm 51:16-17

"I am broken"
When we recognize that we are broken, that's when we get out of the way and really allow God to do his job.

We're all jacked up.  I'm as broken, if not more, than the next guy.
But the truth is, I very often have trouble remembering that.
My pride gets in the way and I think that I can "fix" myself, if I even admit that I need fixing in the first place.

Too often, I think we 'do justice' out of an attitude that we are better than those we are serving.
People can see right through that.
We need to recognize…I need to recognize…that I am broken too.  Just as broken as those we typically think of as 'really jacked up.'  Mine just reveals itself sometimes in more culturally acceptable expressions.

The worst part about brokeness…
Often the only way to discover it is to hit a place of such desperation that all we have left is a clear and obvious picture of how jacked up we are.
That scares me.
I don't want to be there.
But I know I will be better for it.

So whether you're in that place, or in between those points, because they will come, be reminded that you are broken.
Approach others with that spirit.
Approach God with that spirit.
That is the heart that expresses the worship God desires.

I am broken.
How about you?

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3 or 4 years ago, in a class at Vanguard, one of my professors (I think it may have been Roger Heuser) talked about the value of taking a silent retreat.  A day or two or three to just get away and spend the entire time in complete silence, and hear from God.  If you know me, you’ll understand why that sounded like total hell to me.  Which is why I figured it would be a good discipline for me to practice sometime.

So for years I have talked about wanting to do that.  Then I was in Atlanta a few weeks ago and met Eric (@double3).  A few days after I met him, he spent a night at a monastery in silence and solitude.  Thinking about that, I decided it was time and started looking around.  Rachel’s parents are coming into town this week, so I figured I could get away and not be leaving her alone with the kids.

So as soon as I’m done typing this, I’m gonna leave to head to Big Sur Hermitage and spend about 24 hours in silence and solitude with Benedictine monks.

To be honest, I feel kinda weird about it now that I’m heading out.  I was up a few nights ago cause from 3-4 am cause it was so quiet I couldn’t stop my mind from racing.  Thinking about plans, dreams, disappointments, celebrations, concerns, vision, etc.  Add to that the unknown setting of a monastery, I’m kinda nervous, but looking forward to it at the same time.

All that to say I’m gonna go enjoy this view…

…with these guys…

…and do this.

Taking my Bible, Guide to Prayer, My Utmost For His Highest, and a sketchbook/journal.
And will hopefully hear God speak in the silence.
Catch ya on the flip side!

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Perry Noble wasn’t my favorite speaker at Catalyst West Coast.  I liked him, just wasn’t at the top of the list.
That being said, it was a quote from him that’s one of the top quotes that has been stuck in my head ever since I heard him say it.
Something to the effect of:

Overstated?  Maybe slightly, but not by much.
Challenging?  Absolutely.

What would you do?

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A few weeks ago I went on a group ride in Santa Cruz.  A guy was asking what I was training for and we started talking Triathlon.  He asked what my strength is.  I told him at this point I'm just mediocre at all three.  I wasn't trying to lie, but I realized later that I did.  I actually kinda suck at all three.

I tend to be slightly perfectionist…in an odd way.  I think I should be really good at whatever I do.  Even if I rarely do it, or have just started.  Tritahlon is no exception.  I'm not exactly good at everything I do, but there is very little I have committed myself to that I wasn't at least decent at to begin with.

This past weekend I participated in my second Olympic Triathlon.  I primarily did it as part of training for the long course at Wildflower. 
It was a tough race.

My race report will come later, but the point is this…at a few points along the run, there was a part of me that seriously wanted to throw in the towel.  It wasn't cause I was hurting (although I was).  It wasn't even cause I couldn't finish, cause I knew I could.  It was cause I was embarrassed by how long it was going to take me this time.  If it were anyone else I'd be the first one to tell em to keep going and be proud of doing it.  But that doesn't seem to be enough for me.

It got me thinking.  Everything I do is ultimately to the glory of Christ.  This scripture came to mind as I was running:

When I came to you, brothers, I did not come with eloquence or superior wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God. For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified. I came to you in weakness and fear, and with much trembling. My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power, so that your faith might not rest on men's wisdom, but on God's power.
-1 Corinthians 2:1-5

So yeah, I know I'm not exactly out there preaching Christ.  But there was still some truth to that passage as it rang in my head.  Christ is made strong in our weakness.  It's the things we don't do well that force us to lean on Jesus and trust Him to get us through.

When I love something, I wanna share it with others.  I've encouraged multiple people to give a triathlon a shot.  It's fun.  It promotes health.  But what encouragement could I be to people if I was good at it from the beginning?  Instead, I can say, "Hey, I did it.  And got better over time.  You can do it, too." 
It's the same way as each of us work out our salvation in fear and trembling.  I'll keep on pressing on, as Paul encouraged, and in the difficult times is when God will be most glorified.

And in the meantime, I guess I'll work on being OK with not being as good as I want.  Such is life.  I'll commit to pushing to get better.  And I'll let God use teach me in the process, and use my weaknesses to point to Him.

Thank you Jesus for using a Triathlon to teach me a small lesson in humility.

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As I walked in the door for dinner last night, the T.V. was on to CBS.  Caleb was playing in the dining room while Rachel was finishing up dinner in the kitchen, and as I walked in, I happened to catch this segment on the news that caught my interest:

Watch CBS Videos Online

Man, they really packed a lot of thoughts into that 2 minute segment.
Found it interesting though.  A couple lines that especially caught my interest:

"Since 1990, 10% fewer Americans identify themselves as traditional Christians."
"Americans with no religious identity at all has nearly doubled to 15%."
"So called, non-denominational gatherings are growing."
"Many of his members are fleeing religious labels."

I also read an article this week about the use of the word "Christian" vs "Follower of Jesus."

I guess two things came to mind for me here.  One, I'd say it's true that many want to get away from the traditional labels.  Some friends like to note the fact that you will rarely hear me use the word Christian, but more usually will say Christ-follower.  There are lots of preconceived ideas and judgments that I think automatically pop up in one's mind when they hear the word Christian in our culture.  And unfortunately, most of those things aren't based on who Christ truly is, but rather on how we've portrayed Him often times in Christian sub-culture.

The other is that in addition to that, many people, I think especially but not limited to my generation, are definitely steering away from loyalty to a particular denomination.  In fact, I think many are turned off by heavy presence of a denomination in a church.  We're often more concerned with the heart and vision of an organization and less interested in tradition.

So perhaps Americans aren't "losing faith" so much, as the title of the segment suggests.  Perhaps it just looks different than it has in the past.  People are looking for something more genuine and organic.  I'd argue that if we don't consider how we operate in the changing landscape of faith in the west, the Church will continue to lose it's effectiveness in our context.

What thoughts did you have as you watched the segment?
Whether you're a 'Christ-follower', a 'Christian', a 'seeker', an atheist, or none of the above, do share.
I'm curious.

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Day one of the official Catalyst conference is over.  Again it's late.  My notes are in the car, and it would take too long anyway.  I'll try to post session notes tomorrow morning if I have time.  But in the meantime, allow me to share some of my personal journey over the last 24 hours or so.  How Catalyst is effecting me, rather than the content of the information.

I'll preface by saying I usually pride myself on being fairly transparent on this blog.  But I realized that I'm not as transparent as I'd like to think sometimes.  I didn't want to share my thoughts and feelings.  I'd rather hide the vulnerable stuff and show you the put together, ready to lead Bobby. 
But I will anyway.

Last night at the Deadly Viper session, Mike and Jud talked about the things we all have going on under the surface.  That we all have our conference face on.  But there's a lot underneath.  I didn't get that.  Till this morning.

As we worshiped, I realized a joy that I wasn't experiencing that I used to have.  I recognized a dryness inside me.  But I'm at a conference with other ministers.  I wasn't about to let it show. 
Then Andy Stanley got up and talked about moral authority.  He talked about our creed matching our deed.  One of the areas he specifically addressed is forgiveness.  It drudged up some places I have struggled inwardly more than I'd like to admit with forgiveness.  I don't want to deal with it.  But I have to.  It's the virtue at the epicenter of my faith.

All the speakers were amazing today.  But 2 stood out for where I'm at.  Stephen Furtick talked about the painful process that happens between the promise of God and the payoff.  It's a long process.  I really want to start seeing the payoff.  Like now God.  But I'm in the process.

However, one of my personal favorites, Craig Groeschel, pushed me over the edge.  Pushed a lot of us over the edge.  He talked about "it."  I remember when I first had "it."  When Jesus first rocked my world and I was sold out. 
The time I sensed God calling me to go to New York to minister and dropped everything to get a plane ticket before I even had a place to stay.
When ministry was so much more than a job.  In fact, it wasn't a job at all, but it consumed every part of my soul.  I felt myself thinking about my desire to not be in occupational ministry at times in order to rediscover the purity of that passion again.  Craig talked about getting "it" back.  God's desire to use us.
Us asking God to stretch us. 
But first to heal us. 
And before that, to ruin us.

I came to Catalyst expecting to get some great leadership principles.  Expecting to enjoy rockin good music.  But for some reason I didn't expect a serious encounter with God.  But God was already wrecking me.  Not in the hugest ways, but big enough for the pressure to be welling up behind my corneas as Craig shared. 
He invited those who wanted "it" back in their lives, who needed "it" back, to stand for prayer.  I can count on one hand the times I've responded to that kind of invitation from pastors at conferences.  And honestly, I didn't want the people I came with to see me stand.  I wasn't sitting with them, but I figured they could see me.  I stood anyway.

All that to say, God is stirring something in me.
Perhaps this passage from Revelation 2 sums it up nicely.

God, renew my passion for you.  Dive down deep into the recesses of my being and make me uncomfortable.  Stretch me and make me find my strength, my passion, my purpose in You.  Remind me of the faith I had at the beginning and take me back to that place of unabandoned love.  Help me to pursue You relentlessly, being willing to do anything necesarry to get just a glimpse of who you are and to see you work miraculously in my life and in the lives of others, recognizing that you are already pursuing me.  And use this to make me a more complete child of God, a more complete husband, a more complete father, and finally, a more complete vessel of your truth and grace to a world desperately in need of Jesus.

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Slowly but surely, I promise, they are coming!

Let’s see…how how about we tackle the rest of Bet’s questions.

What is your theory on Lost?
Seriously, I’m not one who sits and really tries to come up with theories on it.  I just watch and enjoy, but of course I am trying to figure out what the heck is going on the whole time.
That being said, I do like to waste my time reading mindless drivel on the internet sometimes, and I am a big fan of this theory at this point in time.  Very clever, and seems to have good answers for most everything.

What makes 24 better than Lost?
Two words…Jack Bauer.
See last post below.
Next.

What is your predestination theology stance?
Yes.
Yes, we are chosen.  The Bible says so.
Yes, we have to choose.  The Bible says so.
How are they both true?  Not sure.  But I think it’s one of those things we can’t fully understand.  I used to swing way more to the “we choose” side, but I guess being stuck in a family with all these stinking reformers has got me warming up to Calvin.
Another one of those questions that when it really comes down to it, there are great theologians who I respect and admire from over the years that disagree on this one.  I’m just not arrogant enough to think I can be the one to figure it all out.  Close…but not quite.

Do you approve of women as senior pastors in churches? Why or why not?
Geez Bet.  Thanks a lot.
This is actually one that I keep coming back to and struggling with, and let me preface it by saying that I have not studied it nearly enough to make a solid conclusion yet.  The simple answer is no.  But it’s not that simple.  Let me explain.

I definitely came out of a background that is pretty heavy against the women leading thing, both from Calvary Chapel and Knott Avenue Christian.  So I’ve been recovering.  I’ve swung pretty far away from where I used to be as I’ve looked at the cultural context of certain passages as well as the practical realities.  But Lead Pastor is definitely a place I haven’t been able to move past yet.  On the flip side, while I would not currently attend a church with a female lead pastor, I also don’t condemn those who do or the women who are.  While I may not be all for it, I hardly think it is one of those issues that when we get to heaven, God is gonna be really ticked off about because the wrong gender was expanding the kingdom.

I really would like to be OK with it.  In fact, I think it would be beneficial to the Gospel if I could be.  Here’s my biggest hang up, though.  While I get that some of the passages commonly used are cultural, I also see Paul follow them up with a theological argument.  That’s where I get stuck.  The guy says things I would never say today!  And just for clarification, at this point for me it is definitely not an ability issue, rather it’s a role issue.

Also, as a sidenote, here are a couple of interesting posts regarding this theological issue and the newfound excitement in the Christian community for Sarah Palin.  Go check those out for some thought provoking reading.

So there you have it.  I stirred the pot a little and hopefully the backlash doesn’t get too ugly.
It’s definitely something I want to commit more time and study to in the near future.
How about you other Christ followers out there?
Where do you stand on the issue?  How did you get there?
Share if you dare.

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