My Worship Revolution

This afternoon I got to meet and help out a new friend.
For the purposes of this blog post, we’ll just refer to her as D.

D is in her late 40’s and homeless.
She’s a part of project 180/180, which is how I got to meet her.
(I’ll post more about 180/180 in the future.)

If you saw D on the street, many of us might be tempted to ascribe a whole list of assumptions to her that we have about those in the homeless community.
I spent an hour helping her fill out an application for an apartment.
I don’t know a ton about her, but here’s a few things I learned in the hour I spent with her.

She has carpal tunnel, which is why I wrote most of her application out for her.
She has been in and out of homelessness for a while, it sounds like.
She is widowed and has 2 sons – 1 teenager and 1 who was murdered.
She was in a house for nearly 4 years.
2 years ago she lived there, and ran her own business.
The owner of the house was foreclosed on and she was kicked out.
She’s lost her income stream and everything she had shortly after.
She has been searching for a place to live.
Her income is less than many people reading this probably pay for a car payment.
She has a section 8 voucher that has had to be extended several times because she hasn’t been able to find a home that will accept her.  She’s come close.  Anyone who has looked for housing in Santa Cruz knows it’s not an easy task.
She disappeared for a while because she gave up.  She lost hope.

As we filled out the app, she mentioned how many times she’s done this.
She said she’s tired.
She thanked me and the others there for helping her as best we could.
She looked at us from behind a face that shows her almost 50 years of hard life and then some, and said she’s tired of being homeless.  She wants to start her business again but has nothing to get it started.
I kinda choked up as she walked out  of there, as another housing navigator encouraged her not to lose hope.

Today was just another good reminder that there is so much complexity to the issues of those who are homeless and under-resourced.
Everyone we pass on the street has a story.  A story that matters to God.
And lots of them would love to be out of the situation, and are even doing what they can to do so, but are starting at a disadvantage, be it situational, medical, whatever.
Thanks for the time we spent together today D.  It was good for my soul.
I can’t wait to celebrate when you get a home and take another step toward forward.

Here’s a great article I saw posted by some people on Facebook that has some great insights on poverty in America.

Hello again friends & family,

The year is almost over and it’s been a good one!
I (Bobby) started the year with my second semester teaching music at Ceiba Middle School, continuing to lead and plant Missio Dei Community, and working with CYT Santa Cruz on the side, directing the musical Bye Bye Birdie.  Rachel finished off her first successful year working part time as an Education Specialist with Ocean Grove Charter School.  Of course, it wouldn’t be a Marchessault family year without some form of job change, so don’t expect this story to end that way!

Caleb got involved with karate at the Boys & Girls Club, not to mention some swimming as well, and  Micah had a good time for his first year going to pre-school a few times a week.

As most of you know, 3 years ago we set out on a venture to start a new church community in Santa Cruz, Missio Dei Community.  That continues to be a great faith family for us who we’ve had a blast with this year.  Of course, starting something new like that isn’t without it’s ups and downs and adjusting expectations.  The spring and summer became a time for Rachel and I to wrestle with God a little and ask what this church was supposed to look like and what he wanted us doing.  It was a difficult time, but we came away from it all very clear about and excited about doing ministry in the community of Santa Cruz, a place and a people we have fallen in love with.

Our summer was spent taking a lot of time in Southern California (& a short stint in Portland) meeting with ministry partners and raising support.  While we set to that, Micah and Caleb got to spend a bunch of time staying with Grandma & Grandpa in Big Bear.  Rachel and I had the privilege of getting to see so many great people and catching up with so much friends and family, and under no uncertain terms did we get to go to Disneyland without our kids. (What they don’t know won’t hurt them.)

Caleb finally lost his first tooth somewhere along the way and is now tearing it up in first grade.  His loves to read and we’ve been super proud of how well he’s been doing it.  Both the boys played soccer and I got the chance to coach Micah’s soccer team.  Yeah, get your laughs in now.  You probably know how much of a soccer fan I am, which just shows how much I love my kids.  We also had such a great experience with Marina last year that we opened our home for a month in the fall to Martin, a college student from Denmark.

We became aunt & uncle again recently when Rachel’s brother, Joel, had his 2nd son.  Yup.  That makes the count between our 2 families…boys: 7, girls: 0.  Rachel is now working full time with Ocean Grove and I’m no longer at Ceiba, instead working part time focusing more fully on building Missio Dei Community and spending some more time with the boys.   We’re closing out the year with myself in a musical up here, and all of us looking forward to a nice Christmas as a family in our own home.

It’s been a year of change, but not quite as drastic as some past years.  As we look back, we are so thankful for all the people God has put in our lives.  This summer was a great time of being reminded of all the significant people we’ve been blessed with.  Thank you for being a part of our family and we hope everyone reading this has a blessed holiday season with friends and family.
2014, here we come!!

Merry Christmas y’all!

Bobby, Rachel, Caleb, & Micah

Lay your life down. Your heartbeats cannot be hoarded. Your reservoir of breaths is draining away. You have hands, blister them while you can. You have bones, make them strain— they can carry nothing in the grave. You have lungs, let them spill with laughter. With an average life expectancy of 78.2 years in the US (subtracting eight hours a day for sleep), I have around 250,000 conscious hours remaining to me in which I could be smiling or scowling, rejoicing in my life, in this race, in this story, or moaning and complaining about my troubles. I can be giving my fingers, my back, my mind, my words, my breaths, to my wife and my children and my neighbors, or I can grasp after the vapor and the vanity for myself, dragging my feet, afraid to die and therefore afraid to live. And, like Adam, I will still die in the end.

Living is the same thing as dying. Living well is the same thing as dying for others.

Wilson, N. D. (2013-07-30). Death by Living: Life Is Meant to Be Spent (Kindle Locations 1028-1034). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.

Once a month I get together with a group of pastors in Santa Cruz.  Each month we read a book one of us chooses (or pulls up a review on the phone when we are often negligent in reading), then get together for lunch and drinks (what kind of beverage tends to depend on the restrictions of each persons tradition – sure glad I don’t have any) and discuss the book and our lives and ministries with each other.  I am so grateful to be doing ministry in a place where we get along, encourage one another, pray for each other, and hang out with each other despite our extreme differences in backgrounds, faith traditions, and the ridiculous perception by some, both inside and outside the church world, that we are in “competition” as church planters and leaders.  But enough about that…

We get together today and this time I actually read a good portion of the book. (Trying to make as much progress as possible before heading to Aptos BBQ.)  Death By Living by N.D. Wilson.  I was going to post a portion of the above quote to Facebook, but had too much to say and thought to myself, “No self, you should blog that quote.  Remember that thing?  The word is short for weblog.  You can share a few extra thoughts. Good luck.”

All that to say, I dig the quote up there.  Great book from an author who reflects on his life and experiences and encourages us to really live life.  The concept of the story that we live in has been a great parallel to our journey through the grand narrative of God we have been spending time in at The Hub with Missio Dei Community.  Also as I consider possibly being involved in an improv opportunity next year, I love the reminders of what stories are and what makes good stories.

Point of this post? (Aside from disjointed verbal processing…)

1. I love being connected to other missionaries in Santa Cruz and spending time together.
2. That’s a great quote up there. Read it and be inspired today to live well today.
3. Stories are powerful and important.  We need to tell them more often.
4. Check out the book. It’s worth while.
5. Oh, and I need to blog more.

So #5 wasn’t really mentioned above.  And I promise I’ll stop mentioning it in every post after 1-2 months between them.  But I was telling the guys last time we met, my favorite songwriters to listen to are the ones that inspire me to want to try and write music.  That’s when I know they’re good.  This book inspires me to want to tell more stories, live better stories, and  write some more.  This may be a poor writing sample, but hey, gotta prime the pump.  When you haven’t pumped water out of a well for a while, there’s a lot of sludge that comes out til it gets flowing.  If I worry about editing less, perhaps I’ll actually blog more.
You’ve been warned.

Curious what my other friends are being inspired by these days.
Books, music, stories, art, circumstances, victories, defeats…
Do share…

Tonight our Guinea Pig met his untimely demise.
He started having issues recently.
We did some research and treated him for mites.
Unfortunately it didn’t do the trick.

I was never a huge fan of the rodent, but I found myself pretty bummed about it.
Worse though was  seeing Caleb take it hard.
Of our 2 boys, he’s definitely the more emotional one.
And tonight he laid in bed for a while bawling because he was sad about Ham.
Didn’t help that he saw Ham not lookin so good at the end.
Poor kid.

I might actually miss waking up to squeaking in the middle of the night.
Well, maybe not, but we’ll miss ya Ham!

Believe it or not, I just saw Nacho Libre for the first time las week.
But I digress…

I was 22 when I was baptised at Knott Avenue Christian Church.
I had been baptised as an infant in a Catholic church.
So when I got a card saying congrats, my mom informed me it was a waste of time cause I was already covered.  But hey, double dipping never really hurt anyone, right?

Actually, as I read scripture, I came to understand baptism as something significant to do by my own choice.
I had been a follower of Jesus for a little while, then. I was in a season where I was learning what it meant to really let God be in charge of my life.  I saw that baptism was something that Jesus instructed people to do and even modeled himself before he started his ministry.  Baptism is a powerful picture of identifying with Christ’s death and resurrection.  And while many see it as a cool symbol, I also can’t help personally but believe that there is more to it as well.  I think there is a mystical nature to the practice where Christ is present and uses it to reinforce and bring about transformation in our hearts and lives.
All that to say, I think baptism, while it doesn’t “save” you, is a pretty significant event.
Hey, technically I guess based on our church affiliation now I’m a Baptist, so might as well go with it.

So when my sister told me she had decided she was going to get baptised, there’s no way I wasn’t gonna drive down to San Diego to be there for it.
She’s been a Christ follower for a long time now.  So while it might not signify some huge decision or life-changing event, I think it’s significant. It definitely communicates something about God’s continual work in her life.
Rachel had to work so the boys and I packed up the car and headed south to Chula Vista.
We surprised my sister and possibly added some more stress to her life considering my aunt and uncle were staying at the house, too.

Saturday evening at the beach was the baptism.
Here’s a few shots of her getting dunked.

 

 

 

I had a great time BBQing with her church out on the beach.
And it was awesome to see multiple people baptised out in the (chilly) ocean that evening.
Such a fun, powerful, and creative way to celebrate how God is working in people’s lives.

Caleb having asked about baptism in the past, I was hoping for some good conversation with the boys about it, too.
On the way home I asked Caleb if he saw the baptisms.
“They were boring. They just put people under water.”
Oh well. Maybe later.
Proud of my family and how my sister and her family are so committed to following Jesus in their lives.
It was well worth the 8 hour drives there and back.

“Jesus said to them, “You will drink the cup I drink and be baptized with the baptism I am baptized with…”
Mark 10:39

“We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.”
Romans 6:4

A couple times this summer Missio Dei Community has gotten together at my place for a time of music, prayer, and creativity.  We called it “Dwell,” a time for us to sit with God.  A time to pray together and ask for guidance as we head into the Fall as Missio Dei Community.

Worship through music isn’t something we’ve done a whole lot of since starting as a faith community.
Why? We want to create a comfortable place for anyone to join us and just have good conversation about faith and Jesus.
Let’s be honest.  If you don’t “get” the musical worship thing, 10 people in a circle in a living room singing Kumbaya seems a little weird. (FYI – we don’t actually sing Kumbaya. The songs are much better than that.)
As one respected leader once said to me, “Remove as much as the freak factor as possible.”

That being said, it’s also a huge part of who I am as a leader and who we are as followers of Jesus.
It’s a way for those of us who follow Christ and/or love music to connect to God.
And this seemed like an appropriate season to spend some time in prayer together.

We’ve been trying to incorporate more creative ways of connecting to God for people, too.
We’ve been spreading art supplies and altered books materials around the room for people as well.
One of my favorite parts about last month was my friend Todd joining us.
He ended up with my old job as a music teacher at Ceiba.
He grabbed an old 2nd guitar we have in the house and played along.
A little bit later he moved over to the piano and followed along on that.

With some people singing, and others doing art around the room, it created a really cool relaxed participatory feel.
So much worship music at churches today is about presentation, and it was fun to be able to freely express our prayers through different mediums and instruments without feeling the need to “rehearse” beforehand.
My friend Kevin recently described our community’s worship through music as being less like a concert and more like a campfire.
I like that. Stickin with it.
I’m looking forward to doing it again this weekend as we pray for our community as we launch into a new season of ministry this fall.
Feel free to join us.

How about you?
Just out of curiosity…musical worship, makes sense and you love it or not your thing and aren’t feeling the group karaoke?
I’d be especially interested to hear from my friends who don’t go to church regularly but have experienced it about what your perception was/is.

A few days ago I posted this video from Alan Hirsch on Facebook.
His and Frost’s book The Shaping of Things to Come has had a big influence on my and my dreams for the Church and my ideas for a local faith community.
If you didn’t get to see it, it’s well worth the watch:

Alan Hirsch: Communitas, not Community [VERGE 2010 Video] from Verge Network on Vimeo.

My original intent in posting it in relationship to Missio Dei Community is the Communitas idea of being on mission together.
Of being Comrades.
Of having each other’s backs.

But closely tied to that is what he has to say about safety vs. danger.
It’s a conversation I’ve had with several friends recently.
One of my least favorite cliches I hear in church land…

“The safest place to be is in the center of God’s will.”

Ugh.
Bull.
Best place, absolutely.
But I usually hear this in terms of not having to face challenges, peril, or even death.
Try telling that to the Apostle Paul…

 I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. 24 Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. 25 Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones,three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, 26 I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers. 27 I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked.
2 Cor 11:23-27

The movement of Jesus was one that was subversive.   ALL of Jesus’ inner circle were killed for what they believed.
I hear people talk about the culture having too much influence on the Church instead of vice versa.  It usually revolves around some moral hot button issue.
But I’m way more concerned by the influence the consumer culture and the American dream have had on the movement of Christ.
The idea that Jesus wants us all to live comfortable middle class lives with a nice house and a nice car is bogus.
(I know…easy to say from a middle class faith leader with a nice home and nice car.  The irony isn’t lost on me.)

But I really believe that Jesus isn’t all that concerned about our safety, security, comfort, or convenience.  In fact, if you’re feeling really comfortable in life, I’d challenge you to consider if you’re really stepping out in faith and allowing Jesus to show up.
It’s not very comfortable.
When we left a fairly good paying, secure job at a church over 3 years ago to raise support, take side jobs, and start a new faith community with a couple of people in our living room, I was actually kinda surprised by how many people didn’t get it and thought we were nuts.  Then again, I guess we kinda are.
It’s been the most challenging thing I’ve ever done, and continues to be.  There have been lots of discouraging times and hurts along with some amazing victories and valuable relationships.
Looking back and seeing God show up at every junction has been amazing.

I think I’m starting to ramble.
What’s my point?
I’m not sure.
(Communication 101: know your desired outcome/central purpose from word 1. Fail.)
Except maybe to say that I really don’t think Jesus is that concerned about our safety and comfort.
How that plays out for each of us will look a little different.
But when we start to make safety a core value of the Gospel, we inadvertently remove most of the heart and power of the Kingdom that Jesus proclaimed.
Without risk, there’s not a whole lot of need for faith or God.
And usually that means getting pretty uncomfortable.

Last month we had a great conversation about art & faith.  I posted a recap over here on our church blog.

Tonight we’re getting together to talk about resting.
Sabbath.
Or as I like to say, creating margin in our lives.
Ever seen a paper that looks anything like this?

Margin is the white space between the writing and the edge of the page.
As trusty Wikipedia says, it defines where the test starts and stops.
When I think of my life as a page, I know I have the tendency to want to fill up every last white space I can.  That’s the most efficient way, right?  Then I get the most use out of it!
Except when a page doesn’t leave any margin, not only is it ugly, it’s nearly impossible to read.
In a Twitter age, it’s bad enough if you expect anyone to read more than 140 characters.

I want margin in my life.
When I don’t have it, it effects my family life.
My work quality.
My spiritual depth.

I need margin in my life.
I think we all do.
Tonight, we’ll see who agrees with me.
And hopefully brainstorm some of the enemies of margin and consider how we can win some back.
Disagree? Feel free to come and be the contrarian.
Seriously though, all are welcome. You’re invited. 

In the meantime (or after the fact), do share…
What are some of the enemies of rest and margin in your life?

Pride goes before destruction,
    and haughtiness before a fall.
-Proverbs 16:18

Confession time.  I used to think I was pretty awesome.
Maybe it’s being on stage and having an audience.
Or maybe my mom just told me I was wonderful too much growing up.
At any rate, I was pretty sure I could do anything.
But then…

There is nothing like trying to start a missional church to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like marriage and realizing your shortcomings as a husband to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like trying to be a good father as your kid yells about how you don’t understand to make you feel humble. 
There is nothing like trying to accomplish DIY projects at the house to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like teaching middle schoolers to remind you how uncool and old you are…and make you feel humble.
There’s nothing like a hike in the Santa Cruz mountains through God’s incredible creation to make you feel really small and humble. 

So what I wanna know is, if pride comes before a fall, is the opposite true as well?
When you get to the point where you feel like a failure and a loser, does that mean great things are coming?
I sure hope so!

How about you?
What do you have to remind you that you aint all that and a bag of chips?
Or maybe you are.  In which case, nevermind. And you should host a seminar.

Facebook killed the blogger star.
I used to have a blog.
I guess technically I still do, but for all practical purposes…I don’t.

I’ve been pondering this lately.
And I think for myself, Facebook really has had a lot to do with that.
Sure, there are other excuses.  I’m in a season of life where I have less time.
Ok, well at least one.
But let’s be honest.  I still waste plenty of time on Facebook.

It started slowly with Twitter.
I jumped onboard, and we could all shoot out 140 characters at a time.  So much quicker to look at.
In a microwave age, that was easy to buy in to.
But there is something about Twitter that wouldn’t allow it to quite replace a blog.
I haven’t put my finger on exactly what it is that makes Facebook so much more powerful, but Twitter really is like the gateway drug to Facebook.
At least it was form me.
Maybe it’s cause on Facebook, everything is right there in one place.  The pictures.  The updates. The “likes.” I’m so glad they got rid of pokes. (They did get rid of pokes, right?)

But the truth is, you just can’t process and share in any real depth on Facebook.
I’m not sure why on that one either.
Maybe it’s that we got used to scrolling as quickly through posts as possible, so if I have to push “see more”, well, it better be really good.

But I miss my blog.
Therefore, it isn’t dead.
As Miracle Max would say, it’s mostly dead. There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.   Mostly dead is slightly alive.

And so I’ll attempt (again) to resurrect the blog.
I might need to mostly give up Facebook for a while to do it.
But not sure if I can do that.  So we’ll see.
Ugh, I really am a junkie.  I need help.
Blogging, not dead.
RSS feed, that’s pretty dead I think.
So at the very least, you’ll see the notifications on Facebook.  Cause that may be the only way I get any traffic.

Anyone else still blogging?
I look forward to sharing more, and communicating more.
Hope you’ll join me.
Feel free to resurrect your own blogs with me.
We can start a movement.
We can call it…blog zombies.