My Worship Revolution

Pride goes before destruction,
    and haughtiness before a fall.
-Proverbs 16:18

Confession time.  I used to think I was pretty awesome.
Maybe it’s being on stage and having an audience.
Or maybe my mom just told me I was wonderful too much growing up.
At any rate, I was pretty sure I could do anything.
But then…

There is nothing like trying to start a missional church to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like marriage and realizing your shortcomings as a husband to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like trying to be a good father as your kid yells about how you don’t understand to make you feel humble. 
There is nothing like trying to accomplish DIY projects at the house to make you feel humble.
There is nothing like teaching middle schoolers to remind you how uncool and old you are…and make you feel humble.
There’s nothing like a hike in the Santa Cruz mountains through God’s incredible creation to make you feel really small and humble. 

So what I wanna know is, if pride comes before a fall, is the opposite true as well?
When you get to the point where you feel like a failure and a loser, does that mean great things are coming?
I sure hope so!

How about you?
What do you have to remind you that you aint all that and a bag of chips?
Or maybe you are.  In which case, nevermind. And you should host a seminar.

Facebook killed the blogger star.
I used to have a blog.
I guess technically I still do, but for all practical purposes…I don’t.

I’ve been pondering this lately.
And I think for myself, Facebook really has had a lot to do with that.
Sure, there are other excuses.  I’m in a season of life where I have less time.
Ok, well at least one.
But let’s be honest.  I still waste plenty of time on Facebook.

It started slowly with Twitter.
I jumped onboard, and we could all shoot out 140 characters at a time.  So much quicker to look at.
In a microwave age, that was easy to buy in to.
But there is something about Twitter that wouldn’t allow it to quite replace a blog.
I haven’t put my finger on exactly what it is that makes Facebook so much more powerful, but Twitter really is like the gateway drug to Facebook.
At least it was form me.
Maybe it’s cause on Facebook, everything is right there in one place.  The pictures.  The updates. The “likes.” I’m so glad they got rid of pokes. (They did get rid of pokes, right?)

But the truth is, you just can’t process and share in any real depth on Facebook.
I’m not sure why on that one either.
Maybe it’s that we got used to scrolling as quickly through posts as possible, so if I have to push “see more”, well, it better be really good.

But I miss my blog.
Therefore, it isn’t dead.
As Miracle Max would say, it’s mostly dead. There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.   Mostly dead is slightly alive.

And so I’ll attempt (again) to resurrect the blog.
I might need to mostly give up Facebook for a while to do it.
But not sure if I can do that.  So we’ll see.
Ugh, I really am a junkie.  I need help.
Blogging, not dead.
RSS feed, that’s pretty dead I think.
So at the very least, you’ll see the notifications on Facebook.  Cause that may be the only way I get any traffic.

Anyone else still blogging?
I look forward to sharing more, and communicating more.
Hope you’ll join me.
Feel free to resurrect your own blogs with me.
We can start a movement.
We can call it…blog zombies.

Caleb got a kids video camera from grandma and grandpa for Christmas.
We all told him we could make him a website to post the pictures he takes so grandma and grandpa and everyone else can see them.
As you can see from the video below, I think he’s ready to start blogging!

I think Rachel is making him a Blogger account as I type this.

I’ve been up since 5am this morning.
You’ll see why in a minute.
But that gave me lots of time to think, read pray, etc.
All my thoughts tend to culminate in the shower.  Is that weird?
Anyway, one of my goals this year is to significantly increase my blogging.
As those thoughts were culminating, thought I’d dump em here in case you’re even slightly interested.
A peek in my brain today:

• Thinking of writing a fairly controversial blogpost after reading some news stories this morning.  One that may disturb friends on both sides of issues.  Not ready to open that can of worms yet, so I’ll leave it at that.
• Probably not the best post to start the New Year with…thus, a mind dump post.
• Thinking about issues makes me realize I should send some apologies to a few friends from my past.
•  Inspired  to get some blog posts up at the Missio Dei Community blog.  Need to get on that.
• Had some good ideas I want to jump on for our monthly “Spiritual Conversation” with Missio Dei Community at the end of this month.
• Need to stage some numbers in my head before Bye Bye Birdie rehearsal tonight so I can zip through em in our limited rehearsal time.
• But I have professional development for half the day.  That’s gonna fill my time.
• Speaking of, need to get my final lesson plans and materials together for my sub on Monday & Tuesday while I’m at school.
• Need to work on lesson plans for the next semester.
• Why do I have so much trouble not doing this stuff further ahead of time after all these years of trying to get better at not procrastinating.
• Maybe I should get up early more often.  Fell more motivated this morning than usual.
• Oh yeah, I got up early to make my wife breakfast before she left for work at 6am…cause it’s her birthday.

So the point at the end of that…while there’s a lot I want to get done, most of it will need to be pushed to some other time cause my priority today needs to be celebrating my amazing wife.
She is so worth celebrating and more important than just about any other task I can think of.
Last thought: I better get to work so I don’t get ANOTHER speeding ticket today.

Have a good day y’all.
And wish my wife a Happy Birthday.

Dear Caleb,

I’m writing this to you the day after Thanksgiving.
You probably won’t remember a lot about last night.  I’ll probably forget details over the years, so here’s something for you to read years from now to hear the story, and something to help friends and family share in your journey today.

Last night, we read the story about John baptizing Jesus, which led to you asking lots of questions about baptism; what it means, why we do it, whether or not we have to do it.  And of course that you aren’t sure you want to do it, probably cause of your aversion to ever getting any water on your face.  As a dad it is so awesome to hear you ask questions and have these discussions.
Of course that led to talking about the step before baptism, which is choosing on our own to trust and follow Jesus.

Baptism and Lordship is hard enough to explain to an adult.
I’ve always been unsure how to approach my kid choosing to follow Jesus, baptism, all that stuff.  I want to be sure you can really understand it before you make those decisions.
So we talked about what it means to trust Jesus.  I asked if it was something you might want to do someday.
“Um, I could probably do that tonight, or tomorrow, or next week…pray to God.  That doesn’t sound too hard.”
So, I asked if it was something you wanted to try doing tonight.
“Well, it is past our bedtime, so maybe I should do it tomorrow.  Be sure to remind me, OK dad?”
I said that was a good idea.  Take time to think about it more and we could talk more tomorrow.
After I prayed for you and Micah before bed, you said you wanted to pray tonight.
So I invited mom to come upstairs.
We asked you what it was that you understood.  You went on to tell us that you believe in God, that Jesus is God, and that he died to take away your sins.  And that you want to trust him and follow him.

From there I asked if you wanted me to pray and you could repeat after me.
That got a sideways thumb slightly turned down. Translation: kinda OK, but kinda not.
So I asked if you wanted to pray yourself and I could help you if you got stuck or wanted.
Your thumb went slightly upward.
So you laid your head on your pillow and clasped your hands together.
Mom and I were both sitting in silence, waiting for you to start talking.
Then I look down at you with your eyes closed, quite intent, and your lips slightly moving, and I realized you were talking to God all on your own.
Then you looked up cause you were done.
I asked if you prayed to God on your own.
You pointed to your head with a big smile and said, “Yup! In here!”

It’s interesting for mom and I to process faith and all.
Truth be told, we’re not so sure there’s a whole lot different than yesterday at this time.  Really, you already have been understanding who Jesus is and believing in him.  You probably aren’t any more “spiritual” than you were before.
But there’s a significance in voicing that understanding and making a decision…even at 6 years old.

You have a long spiritual journey ahead of you.
Right now, you haven’t had much to challenge your faith.  Those times will come.  You will doubt what you’ve learned.  And that’s OK.  You will go through difficult seasons.  You will have to confront and wrestle with real issues and questions of faith.
Your faith will be strengthened at times.  You will continue to see God do things that you know can only be him.  You will see his faithfulness to your family and to you.
The good stuff, the bad stuff, these are all things that will really make your faith your own over time.  And as much as I want control over what that will look like, only God can fully participate in that journey with you.
But wherever your path takes you over the next 60 years, we’re grateful that you can always look back to Thanksgiving, 2012, as perhaps the first significant milestone in figuring out who God is, and how you become the bold leader that I believe He has called you to one day become.
While I’m not sure it greatly changes your relationship to Jesus since yesterday, it is significant in beginning to walk with Christ.
Thanks for sharing that with dad.
It’s something I’ve looked forward to since before you were born.
And I can’t wait to be a part of helping you process faith for many years to come.

-dad

Caleb’s prayer:  God, today was a bad day, but I guess it was a little good.  Thank you for the things that we have that other kids don’t have.  Please help all those kids and keep them safe.

My prayer: God, thanks for glimpses of you at work in our kids.

(Especially to keep us encouraged at times like now when Micah’s still awake, getting out of bed, and whining way too much!)

Been thinking I need to get to blogging again.
Apparently it took a #fail at the drive in to get me to do it.
It’s sort of a long post, but I don’t know how else to do it.
Here’s my story and I’m sticking to it…

On Friday, I thought to myself (around 3:30pm as Rachel was about to be heading home from a day of meeting with students in Monterey) that it would be fun to go to the drive in with the kids, an activity we enjoy as a family.  I throw the idea by Rachel when she gets home, and we decide to head out after dinner, driving over the hill to see Nemo and Ice Age 4.

Now here comes fail #1.  Nemo is released again because now it’s in 3D.  Being that it’s the main movie for that screen, and it was advertised that you could see it cheaper than your friends at the normal theater, I guess I must have just assumed it was 3D.  So after we pay, I ask, “Do you guys have 3D glasses up here?”
The look on the gals face said it all.  ”Is this guy an idiot?”
Her manager is right next to her and says, “We don’t have the technology to do 3D here.”
Seriously?  They can broadcast an episode of Chuck in 3D in my living room but you can’t do it at the drive in?  Whatever, it’s all good.  So we paid to see a movie that’s sitting on our shelf.  We’ll have fun anyway.

We get all settled with pillows and blankets in the back of our Swagger Van.
The sound starts off fine, until half way through the second preview it drops out of one speaker and is low.
So I go to find out what the deal is.
They tried to fix it, but really just made it louder.

Enjoyed the movie.
Started the car a few times so the battery wouldn’t die.
Ran the car for a few minutes in between that and the next movie to charge it up some.
A big pick up truck (Ford F-150? Ram 2500? Something like that) pulls really close right up next to us for the second movie. (This will come back into play in a minute.)

Now that we’ve seen Nemo for the umpteenth time, Rachel and I are looking forward to seeing something new.
Until our battery dies and we lose the radio about 15 minutes in. <sigh>
Luckily I know they have those battery powered jumper cable things for people like us.  So I go to get those so we can start it up and see the rest of the movie.
Except someone has it out.  And somebody else is waiting for it.  Apparently there’s a lot of us out there.
Guy brings it back and let’s us know it wouldn’t work.  It’s dead.  Apparently didn’t work for the lady before him either.
The couple who was waiting for it just need a little juice so they’re gonna try anyway.  OK, I’ll keep waiting and see how this pans out.
More waiting, and they come back with no success.  Turns out they have a big truck, though.  I just have the mini-van, so maybe it’ll work for me.  Mind you the battery tester says it’s good…until you connect it to a car.  The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.  Yes. I’m insane.  What else was I gonna do?
No…it didn’t work.

I took it back in where someone else was waiting for it.  I let them know that’s four times in a row it hasn’t worked.
They too needed to see it for themselves.

By this time the kids are asleep, Rachel is mostly asleep, and we need to just wait out the movie and then look for a jump.
Although I did Facebook that we might need a jump and had 3 or 4 offers almost immediately.  It’s good to have friends.  I almost said yes just so I could see some of them I hadn’t seen in a while.

Movie ends.
I ask a few cars around and no one has cables.
Remember the truck that pulled up next to us?  I figured a truck like that should have jumper cables.  But I also remember it’s a fairly young guy and a chick in the passenger seat.  I notice her lean over to kiss him and figure I’ll check with a few other cars.
Still, no dice.

I see em both just chillin in their seats, so I decide it’s time to approach the truck.
I look at the girl in the passenger seat who gives me an uncomfortable look back.  I kinda make a motion like, can y’all roll down the window?  The guy either doesn’t see me right next to him or is trying hard not to make eye contact.
After another few seconds, I notice her kinda pull her had from under the bottom area of his shirt.  He raises his seatback to a more upright position, and i think buckles his pants.
Awkward moment.
I walk away.
Don’t think they’re anxious to help us.
They took that as their cue to leave.
*Sidenote: I get that someone might go to the 10:15 kids movie for that sort of thing, but if so, wouldn’t you think you’d find a fairly secluded spot rather than pull up right next to the family mini-van? Just sayin.

Finally we found some cables and a guy in a truck who saw our hood up and stopped to help.
And we returned home after keeping our kids out late to see a movie we had at home and another one with no sound so we have a vague idea what happened…just enough to ruin the movie when we actually watch it.
#fail

This part of a 5 part series I’ve been posting on some thoughts and learnings I’ve had through The whole Kony 2012 phenomenon.

Part 1: Facebook sucks…
Part 2: Don’t make it personal.

Today…

If you have an idea, go for it…you never know what could happen.

I was watching another video of Jason being interviewed on Today Show in Australia.  I found it interesting that in it he mentioned that their goal for the video was to have 500,000 people see it over the course of the year.  As of me writing this almost 80 million people have seen it.

Too often we are moved by something, perhaps even want to do something about it, but figure we couldn’t really pull much off.
9 years ago when these guys came across an issue that moved them in Uganda, they probably imagined that they would ever reach the level of impact that they already have.
But they did something.
And it became bigger then they would have ever imagined.
And even before they got news out to millions of people, it was with it for those who they were able to help.

Recently my brother-in-law shared this news story he saw that hit him like a sledge hammer to the chest.
It’s about a Syrian baby that dies in the hospital while they are there.
It’s kinda graphic.  You’ve been warned:

He knew he had to do something.
Doesn’t know what that looks like, but for now, he’s putting together a website to at least share it and gather intercessory prayer.
I can’t wait to see what God does with it.

I talked to a good friend and mentor of mine the other day.
His name is Boomer.
He and his wife are in the process of starting a non-profit for global social justice issues.
The idea is to commission and gather artists to use their talents to make a difference.
Another one I’m excited to hear about as it comes together.

So what has moved you lately?
What ideas and dreams do you have that  you’ve pushed aside?
What cause or issue have you come across that you felt like you had to do something about?
Go for it.
Cause it’s better to try something than to do nothing.

I posted Lesson #1 yesterday.
Already failed.  Apparently I hadn’t successfully separated Twitter and Facebook.
They are now divorced.

Second thing that came to mind was less of a learning and I guess more of a reminder…

When people disagree with you, they seem to insist on making it personal.

What’s up with that?!
Some of the almost direct quotes I read (cause I’m not going to go look them all up)…

“… hipsters making themselves feel better…”
“…using this horrible situation to increase their own influence and finances.”
“…white people in acid washed jeans talking about Africa…can’t get their own priorities straight.”

So at the risk of sounding like I’m doing some form of name dropping…cause I’m not…I would call Jason Russell an acquaintance.
Nevermind, I call everyone a friend.  Even people I know less than him.  He’s a friend.
We did some theater theater together at CCT down in San Diego when I was in high school.
His dad, Paul, is the founder of CYT, an organization I grew up participating in and now work for and I would call Paul a friend.
Point is, I know several members of the family.
All that to say it’s easy to make generalizations and negative comments when you don’t know somebody.  I know them well enough to confidently say that they are great people with great hearts doing the best they can to make a difference.  And in the process, doing a lot more than most others.

Perhaps that’s why it bothered me so much and I kept feeling this need to defend them.

Landing point today…
I can live with people disagreeing with methodology.
Don’t think a movie is the best way fo raising awareness?  Fair enough.  Find a better way and do it.
Think there are bigger fish to fry?  Fair enough.  Go champion those causes.
But today when you come across someone you disagree with, there’s no need to slander them or their character in the process.
Have a discussion about methodology and principles, but don’t assume to know the intentions of someone else’s heart.
Be nice people.

Unless you were living under a world wide web rock, there’s a good chance you heard about Kony 2012 last week.
If you missed it, here’s the video that caused quite a stir.
I recommend checking it out.  Well worth the 30 minutes.

This week, I decided to share a blog series on some things I learned or reflections I pondered as a result of the video and all that surrounded it.
And the first one has absolutely nothing to do with kids in Africa, Invisible Children, or Joseph Kony…

Lesson #1: Facebook Can Be Toxic To My Soul

For reason’s I’ll get into later in the week, I liked the video, I liked the cause, and I am a supporter of Invisible Children.
As with anything that happens these days, everyone has their own opinions.  And they aren’t always friendly in how they communicate them.
I spent a good portion of my online time last week commenting on negative posts about the video.  I felt like I had this need to defend them.
Not every post that disagreed with them was rude, so don’t assume that cause I commented on your status I think you’re a jerk.  Different opinions are OK.
Again, I’ll get into that later in the week.

But with all that it became clear how emotionally taxing something as stupid as being on Facebook was for me.
Now don’t hear what I’m not saying!
I’m not saying that Facebook itself is toxic.
As with most any tool, it can be good, or it can be negative, and most of the time it’s a little of both.
But for myself, I kinda reached my limit.
So I decided I’m gonna get kinda crazy.

I didn’t give anything up for Lent or anything, but hey…better late than never.
So I’m gonna take a break from Facebook til after Easter.
Would probably be smarter this year if I just took a break til November 7th!

Now there are a few small exceptions…

• Messages
  There are people who contact me through Facebook or that I can only reach by Facebook.  I’ve reconfigured my notifications so I’ll get an email of any messages I get through Facebook.
• Blog Posts
  I’m not taking a break from social media, just Facebook.  That’s the one for me personally right now that seems to suck my time and energy away.  I may still Twitter on occasion.  I’ve disconnected my Twitter from Facebook for this time so you won’t see them there.
  I plan to return to being a better blogger during that time, and the reality is hardly anyone comes over here from the RSS feed anymore.  So I’ll keep it posting on Facebook to let people know when I post.  But I’ll mention on each one, don’t comment on it at Facebook.  You won’t get an answer, at least not til April 9th.  Comment right here on the blog and let’s chat together here.
• Work/Ministry Pages
  I may use it on occasion just to update things I need to for Missio Dei Community and CYT.

There ya have it.
Facebook, see ya in about a month.