28 May 2009 ~ 9 Comments

Gay Marriage In California – The Solution

A few days ago the California supreme court voted to uphold prop 8.
After a lull of silence, the Facebook posts about gay marriage began reappearing, and the protests in downtown Santa Cruz commenced.

Truth is, I'm not real passionate about either side of the argument on this one, which pretty much pisses off both sides.
I am, however, very passionate about marriage.
About the sacredness of the institution.

So I have my vote on the solution.
Get rid of marriage as we know it all together.
Hold on.  Let me explain.

The church argument has been that God's view of marriage is between a man and a woman.
I agree.
Well, actually, let me take it a bit further.
Marriage is between a man and a woman who love Jesus and are entering into a covenant in the sight of God, into a relationship that brings about holiness more that happiness, and living out a sacrament that is God's example to the world of the relationship Jesus has with His church.
Uh oh.
By that definition, we really shouldn't allow atheists to be married either.

The argument being made is that we need to protect marriage.
I agree.
But we lost a lot of ground there the moment marriage became a legal, binding contract managed by the government.
So the answer, let's protect marriage by giving it back to institutions of faith.
The state of California simply issues civil unions.  As I believe they already do for homosexual couples.  Except the legal ramifications are the same for whoever it is.

Then, if a couple wants to be married, that is an issue to be taken up at the church.
Am I oversimplifying the argument?
Absolutely.
But I think you get the point.
In most cases, we lost the battle for marriage a long time ago, and I question how we can really salvage it completely as long as it is a government institution.

I say this every time I do this.
I don't usually like to get political here.
But I guess this is kinda a big deal in my state right now.
And it's been on my mind.

I doubt it will ever happen, but there's an idea for ya.
Now don't be shy.
Respond.

P.S. – This is a view shared by Ryan Lipert and I over several coffees.  So if you hate the idea, be sure to comment on his blog too.  I'm sure he probably came up with it…if you don't like it that is.  ;)

9 Responses to “Gay Marriage In California – The Solution”

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  3. Michelle Lasch 31 May 2009 at 9:28 am Permalink

    You may be right… we have already lost.

  4. bobby 30 May 2009 at 10:28 pm Permalink

    Kevin – The post you sent? Nah. Did you leave a comment before? If so I didn’t get it.
    And Michelle – you know I love you right back. ;) Good thing we can love each other without always agreeing.
    I like what you said at the end. Yes, Jesus did leave us His church. That’s why we should be concerned about what is happening in the church more than in the culture. The reality is we live in a post-Christian society. The church is no longer the center of society and our views don’t hold the weight in the secular arena that they once did.
    Why go to father for an example? The point I’m making is we’ve already lost that battle with marriage. Yes. It is an important metaphor. And it’s not damaged any more in my opinion by people of the same sex being married than by a male and female living in total opposition to God. I reiterate, I just don’t know that we can really reclaim marriage if the state is the one defining it, and the church doesn’t have the right to define it for the state and those outside our faith.
    Of course, it’s all just interesting conversation cause I’m pretty sure this would be a bit too radical a move for anyone to go through with anyway.

  5. Kevin Marchessault 30 May 2009 at 7:29 pm Permalink

    Dude, did you get the post I sent?

  6. Michelle Lasch 30 May 2009 at 5:14 pm Permalink

    O.K., first of all, let me say you know I love ya, Bobby. But… you are guilty of what Thomas Sowell calls “First Stage Thinking.” It’s the tendency to come up with what sounds like a great idea, without the… “and then what?” part.
    Well here’s the “and then what” part. If churches begin defining marriage, the Lutherans, the Episcopalians, the Methodists, and the Presbyterians define it as between two people, whatever their sex. So you have now just lost the debate. It is ended and gay marriage is instituted. Marriage as we know it is dead.
    The problem you are missing is that this isn’t about rights or compassion or even love. It’s about one simple thing, the definition of a single word, the Webster’s Dictionary #1 definition. They want to change it. If it was about rights or compassion or love, those are already addressed with our current civil unions. As you can see, that is not good enough. They want the word.
    Why is the word so important? Well, I offer it’s because it is a spiritual battle. satan has tried to counterfeit what God has created since the very beginning. He knows the importance of marriage, as you do. He knows God created it to be a picture of His love for us. He knows marriage is one of God’s most important metaphors. That’s why he want it. If he can steal marriage, he can hurt one of the ways God communicates His love to us.
    Want an example? Look at “father” as a word satan has worked hard to destroy. God wants us to see Him as a father, yet satan has destroyed families to the point that most kids today grow up without a father or with a horrible example of one. How many people do you know that have trouble relating to God as their father, when their personal image of the word “father” is so warped.
    If it was as simple as you make it, we could just create a different word for each situation: Garriage (gay marriage); Sarriage (marriage to a sibling); Parriage (polygamous marriage); Darriage (marriage to your dog); Tarriage (marriage between three people). Unfortunately, it’s not that simple. This is a spiritual war.
    Is the church fighting it correctly? Probably not. After all, the church is made up of hugely fallible humans and ever since Jesus left the church in our hands, we have screwed it up. But that doesn’t excuse us from prayerfully trying to do what’s right. And Jesus DID leave the church in our hands. He must want us to humbly and prayerfully lead this thing, otherwise, He could have stayed and run it Himself!

  7. Sarah 29 May 2009 at 11:13 am Permalink

    I like it Bobby! I agree and have been saying for a long time that perhaps the solution is to create a separate but equal (as far as taxes, laws, rights, ect) word and process for gay marraige. I believe the government should not be involved in the situation that clearly belongs to the Church and those who are a part of it so I totally agree…weird…I am a Raiders fan and still agree with something you said! :)

  8. Cole Hegwood 28 May 2009 at 10:53 pm Permalink

    that is a fantastic idea!

  9. Ryan Lipert 28 May 2009 at 5:53 pm Permalink

    Couldnt have said it better myself. Oh wait… I did.


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